Minnesota woman who survived rape in room facing window

Rape is sex you don’t agree to. Rape is an act of violence, power, and aggression.

“I didn’t say no or try to fight, so was I raped?”

Healthy relationships are about consent and respect. Rape has nothing to do with love, passion, or sex between two partners.

Most victims are raped by someone they already know; a friend, partner, co-worker, boy/girlfriend, or even a spouse. This can be confusing at times, because you may already have some type of relationship with the person that assaulted you.

It is still rape:

  • If you are under the age of consent
  • If you are are forced or threatened
  • If you are drugged or “roofied”
  • If you are unconscious (drugged, drunk, asleep)
  • If you are fearful of physical harm from your attacker and don’t protest

If you have been raped, you may want to seek help and medical attention.

If you choose to have a medical exam, keep the following in mind:

  • You can ask to have an advocate (supportive helper) with you throughout the process
  • For the purposes of the medical exam and collecting evidence, do not shower, brush your teeth, or douche
  • Bring any evidence (for example, if you’ve changed your clothing, put the clothes you were wearing in a paper bag and take with you to the hospital)
  • If you think you may have been drugged, alert medical personnel
  • Know that some “date rape drugs” exit the body fairly quickly, within 8 hours
  • If you are able, don’t urinate (pee) until the exam or urinate into a clean container and bring it with you to the hospital

Get the Advice and Help You Need

If you are unsure what to do, call the Minnesota Day One Crisis Hotline at 1.866.223.1111 to speak with an advocate (interpreters are available), text 612.399.9995, or click the CHAT NOW button on this site to connect with a Day One advocate. 

There are advocates available in your area that can help you find local resources and can support you in your process, whatever it may be (i.e. reporting, seeking medical attention, talking with an advocate, or just sharing your story). A Day One advocate is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to assist you.

If you are in immediate danger, call 911.

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